Saturday, March 8, 2008

Pet Peeve #27

I absolutely can't stand when people keep their eyes open during a massage, looking around or staring at the ceiling like a corpse. Some clients up the weird factor when they stare right at you. That shit creeps me the hell out. It reminds me of that one painting of Jesus my mom had in the stairwell of our house when I was growing up. You know the one I'm talking about, where Jesus is holding up the piece sign with one hand, while his heart is on fire and he looks all tired and dehydrated like he just walked for 40 days in the desert, in those wretched leather sandals with no arch support. Yeah, that one. Anyway, I used to swear that the eyes in that painting would follow me around like the haunted house paintings in the Scooby Doo Cartoons. Not cool.

Do yourself, and your therapist a favor, keep your peepers closed. I'm not saying it's not cool to take in your surroundings, or glance at your therapist from time to time. But really, let's leave the staring for when we're at the club. Besides, I cut some mean rug.

7 comments:

Krissyface said...

I totally know that jesus painting. Freaks me the fuck out.

Fleas said...

Oooooh . . . I remember that painting . . . eyes following and everything . . .Thanks for the tip.

Mr. Poopie said...

krissy - thanks for stopping by, I couldn't agree with you more.

fleas - lol, spooooooo-key

Ginormous Boobs said...

Who does this?? And how the heck do you relax if you're busy looking around?

Stooopid!

Mr. Poopie said...

Boobs - lol, I know, I know. I wish I could tase them or something.

la cubana gringa said...

We didn't have the Jesus picture, but my aunt did have a series of Clown posters that had the same eye-following effect. Throw in the movie Poltergeist and I was one FREAKED out kid!

Mr. Poopie said...

Cubana - I walked in on my cousins watching Nightmare on Elm St. when I was a kid. Took me years to get the image of that girl getting pulled through the little window of her front door at the end.